Top 10 Funny Filipino Jokes Why I Need To Hire You
Filipino Humors
Funny Filipino Jokes #1
There were two nuns. One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL). It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.
SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.
SL: It's logical. He wants to rape us.
SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most! What can we do?
SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.
SM: It's not working.
SL: Of course it's not working. The man did the only logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.
SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.
SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both.
So the man decided to follow Sister Logical. Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried about what has happened to Sister Logical. Eventually, Sister Logical arrives.
SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell me what happened!
SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me.
SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?
SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.
SM: And?
SL: The only logical thing happened. He reached me.
SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?
SL: The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.
SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?
SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.
SM: Oh, no! What happened then?
SL: Isn't it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than man with his pants down.
Funny Filipino Jokes #2
And for those of you who thought it would be dirty, say two Hail Marys!
Sisa: Ganda ng rolex mo bunso, ah..
Pedro: Napanalunan ko po sa karera ate.
Sisa: Talaga? Ilan kayong tumakbo?
Pedro: Tatlo lang po. Yung pulis, yung may-ari at ako po..
Funny Filipino Jokes #3
Lolo and apo naglalakad sa sea shore
Apo: Look at those boats lolo.
Lolo: Yes apo, those are called yachts.
Apo: lolo , How do you spell yachts?
Lolo: oh!! You're right apo, those are boats.
Funny Filipino Jokes #4
Pedro: Tol, noong mayaman pa kami, nagkakamay kaming kumain. Ngayong mahirap na kami, nakakutsara na.
Juan: Baligtad yata?
Pedro: Mahirap kamayin ang lugaw, tol!
Funny Filipino Jokes #5
Job Interview
Boss: Why we need to hire you?
John: Kasi po mas bago palang po ako kaya wala pa po akong sungay
Boss: English please
John: Ah…Uhmm well you see im brand new so im not yet HORNY ::D
Funny Filipino Jokes #6
Titser: Ano ang hugis ng mundo?
Juan: Kuwadrado po, maam!
Titser: Hindi! Ang mundo ay bilog.
Juan: Pero maam, sabi ng lolo ko, narating na niya ang APAT na sulok ng mundo. May sulok po ba ang bilog?
Funny Filipino Jokes #7
LOLO: Apo, Apo, magtago ka dali, nanjan teacher mo. Absent ka pa naman sa klase mo. APO: Naku magtago din po kayo Lolo. Kasi sabi ko namatay ka kaya absent ako!
Funny Filipino Jokes #8
Anak : Ma, Mahirap po bang MABUNTIS ?
Mama : Oo ! Lalo na sa isang BAKLA katulad mo!
Manahimik ka nga JUNIOR!
Funny Filipino Jokes #9
Graduation Speech: Tonight i am graduation, i invitation you all to eat our house because i know someday i will eat your house too. i will die five chickens, three girls and two boys to eat you all and i will ask my father to cook my mother.
Funny Filipino Jokes #10
Nung teen ager pa ako, pag may pinupuntahan akong kasalan, lagi akong tinutukso ng mga kamag-anak ko ng, “Uuuuyyyyy….susunod na sya…..”.
Naiinis ako kasi bata pa ako kaya nung minsang magkita-kita uli kami sa isang burol ng kamag-anak namin, sila naman ang pingasabihan ko ng,
“Uuuuyyyy….susunod na sila
Bakit hindi sila natawa?
 |
| Getmypopcorn Memes (Image credits to pixabay) |
No comments